Category Archives: Natasha

About our oldest

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Setting Goals

So, mainly from recognizing the influence that goals had on me as a foster parent, I’ve decided I need to set goals for my own kids. And these are going to be basic, realistic goals here.

“Independently using the potty” is too big a goal for Melody just now. We’re going to start with just “Uses the potty when cued without complaining.”

For Elisha, the big one I would have put at the top of his list Jay just saw the fruition of Saturday night: Understanding and accepting the concept of ‘taking turns’.

Jay has been consciously working on that goal every time he has all three kids together. Elisha would consistently wig-out at having to let the ball go and watching someone else catch it.

Then, Saturday night when I was out storytelling, Jay was throwing the ball to each of them in turn, saying their names before tossing it, and Elisha got it. He sat and waited until his name was called, and then came alive, “catching” the ball and then throwing it back to Jay to pass to the next kid.

*Very* cool.  A lot of kids older than 20 months still don’t have this figured out 😉

So here are my little-step goals I want to keep in mind as we go through our days (the mechanism of attaining the goals is not always obvious, but I found before that focusing on the goals seems to shape what happens into meeting them).

For Natasha:

  1. Will use consistently kind words and tone, even when frustrated with siblings.
  2. Will be willing to read aloud when cued.
  3. Will put away books and toys when finished.

For Melody:

  1. Will use the potty when cued, without complaining.
  2. Will begin spontaneous sentences in a low voice.
  3. Will use words to express emotions, rather than crying or pouting.

For Elisha

  1. Will use words and signs rather than grunts for specific requests.
  2. Will patiently wait during diaper changes.
  3. Will stop grabbing objects from others.

All of these are things that we don’t currently have, but are (I believe) near enough that they’re not unreasonable.

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Natasha Milestones

She combed out her own hair after a shower, and use the ‘Y’ in yellow for the first time.

In the “Cinderella dressed in Yella” rhyme.  Only, when the girls do it it’s a non-distorted “true” word.

They were still asking for “The Sound of Muquis” (sounds almost like mucus) instead of The Sound of Music just yesterday.  So they haven’t lost all their “cute talk.”

Mom always cringes when they girls use that word, and Dad snarks when they talk about the movie.

We figure they’ll get it right eventually and till then it gives us a laugh.  Worth letting it stick around until it dies a natural death.   I don’t think it’ll make it to 5th grade.

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Books Figure Largely in Our Lives

Like I mentioned earlier, I spent most of January 1st working on books.

The girls and I traded bookshelves in our bedrooms. These pictures are the girls washing their “new” kid-sized bookshelf.

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And then I saw Elisha in his little rocking chair, sitting with “Where the Wild Things Are” in a perfect photo-op set-up. But Jay flopped out behind him on the bed and the boy immediately climbed over the back of the chair to get his daddy to read to him.

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There were so many great expressions the camera was *just* too slow to catch, but these were still fun too.

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That last one is E roaring at the pictures of the “wild things.”

It’s so fun to watch my family do stuff together!

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Natasha’s Observations

Natasha [whispered to me]: Daddy’s being a good daddy: he’s changing the sheets.

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She’s been playing one of Jay’s Everquest characters this morning, too, and I heard her run to Jay and shout, delighted, “I collected a striped blue butterfly!”  Which is doubly adorable because she only knows that because of the print that came up on the screen.

Jay and I are continually surprised at what words she has in her sight-vocabulary.  It’s very fun.

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A new food

Isn’t this sad?

The girls didn’t even know what cauliflower is.  Shopping yesterday I bought some, and the girls’ reactions were great.

“What’s that?” (distrustful) “What do you do with it?”

I explained it by saying you can do anything with it you do with broccoli. One of the girls gushed, “You can make soup with it!”

So that’s the plan for dinner.

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A Complement

The girls have developed an attachment to The Sound of Music and we were watching it this morning.

How would you explain Maria’s leaving after her dance with the Captain?  To a 3- and 4-year-old?  I did okay, I guess, but I’ve not had an answer before today (and they have asked).

Today I said Maria thought she couldn’t serve God if she got married, and she felt she loved the Captain and wanted to leave before he wanted to get married.

Natasha seemed to understand me, and I added “That’s a little silly, isn’t it?  We know lots of people who are married and serve God.  Don’t we?”  She grinned.

“You!” she said.

I liked that.

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Catching up

Well, it’s been a while so I wanted to write something 😉

We spent a lovely week up North with Jim and Teena, half of it also with Aaron and Autumn, allowing me the rare opportunity to talk with them and especially to get to know Autumn better. Very special.

If I haven’t said so before, Elisha is definitely not a baby anymore. He is done nursing, plays with the big kids, and knows his own mind. He is picking up quickly on new signs, loves his animal-noises book and when he uses an English word it can be surprisingly distinct– once you realize he’s saying a word.

(“Stuck” was one that debuted at Grandma Teena’s house. And he was.)

Melody has been nearly dry for two days– that is to say, I think she had two wet diapers yesterday, and only one today. She was also dry all night.

Still doesn’t seem to care much though. I praise her when she’s dry but she *hates* to be “reminded” (nagged) so this is still very much going at her pace. This is the same progression that happened with Natasha a little bit earlier age, even, so I’m content just riding along for a while more.

The less I rush it the less trained I have to be.

Natasha has been very snuggly lately. I mentioned to Dad tonight that if I didn’t have snuggly kids I might be mourning more the growing up of my babies. But since they all are still little starfish– desiring to be with and on and attached to me– I have nothing to miss except their smallness, which I only miss when I’ve been holding them, standing, for way too long.

Natasha is, I think, more ready for focused, orderly, school work, but that is currently on-hold until I learn a new way to provide her was the structure she needs and shelter that order from her siblings who do not currently crave the same type of order.

All the Children love to dance– at home– all it takes is putting on one of their favorite recordings and they are instantly into it. Natasha will sing along too, sometimes, when encouraged. Mom is hoping we can get all the kids to sing together when her other grandkids are in town for a few days.

I have my doubts about its chance for success, but maybe having older models will be enough to surprise me.

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Natasha and Kindergarten

I’m not sure where exactly she got the concept of “kindergarten,” but Natasha’s asked a couple times now when she’s starting and how it will be different than preschool.

In case you haven’t heard, I’m planning to start her in the Fall of ’08. She’ll be 5, then. I had wanted to wait until she was 6, but then I realized that Melody would be 5 that fall (maybe ready to start, herself), and I did want them to be separated a year.

I explained that kindergarten will be different because she will be doing school every day that Daddy goes to work, and we will be spending more time on some new things. The idea pricks her interest, but I can tell she’s not ready for it yet. She has a terrific attention span for things of her own choosing, but she hasn’t learned to consistently apply it to something of my choosing, which is something school will require.

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I’ve Got it so Easy

We were to have some company yesterday morning, and knowing that always makes the children impatient.  It led to my having this exchange with Natasha:

N: What’s taking her so long?

A: She’s got two little kids who are too little to help, so she has to do all the getting ready herself.

N: Wow.  That’s a lot of work

A: Yes, it is.  I’m glad I have such big kids to help me.  It’s very nice.

And she  went back to helping clean up.  Very nice.