This is Cream. Her twin sister, Sugar, was a bit more shy tonight and  wouldn’t come up for the camera.

They’re only interested in jack-in-the-boxing when they’re being ignored.

Like when we’re making lunch.

That’s where the goats have  been hanging out for the last week: in a tarp-lined Pack’n’Play with a shavings-bed.

They’re in our main room, so, yeah, the same room we eat in.

It’s the room Jay and I sleep in too, so it’s definitely been like having infants: their little (but insistent) bleating whenever they think were’ awake (and therefore should be FEEDING them, of course).

The weather  has been so nice since we got them, too.  I think it’s been above zero every day and sparkling sunshine. They’re completely not-interested though, and their first trip outside required some serious bribery to keep them out and moving in any direction other than the front door.

We did opt to de-bud them, and I took them to a more experienced goat-person to do the job.  I was glad though, to have a reason to stand and talk with her (and another long-timer) for a while.

It is as though I’m afraid of being too delighted. Kinda like the way you feel in high school when you enjoy something, but you’re afraid showing that enjoyment will just show how new you are to it.  How inexperienced and novice.

(And the last thing a high school kid wants to feel is young.) My take on this fear was anxiety that I would not be taken seriously. That if people realized I was not enured to the world around me, they could believe I was some glassy-eyed Idealist who didn’t understand The Real World.

Even as an adult one of my deepest hungers is to be taken seriously. To have my words and perceptions be trusted and mean something.

Almost as a confession I told my new acquaintance, “I am so giddy-excited at this new beginning.  Is that really immature or silly?”

And I almost held my breath, waiting and hoping for the life-giving words she gave me.

“Oh being excited is totally okay. We’re in the middle of kidding [baby goats being born] right now: a dozen new babies and more due today and tomorrow. We are very excited.” And her face shared the truth of her enjoyment.

And my anxious heart felt peace.

Now, even if I meet other animal folk like the ones I met last summer (who have the enured thing down really well), I can rest in my own enjoyment, because this is about life; sharing life and celebrating life.

And I hope I will always be excited about that.